RECRUITING

Looking for a tech savvy legal team:

1. Must be comfortable in front of a camera.
2. Needs to be street smart.
3. Needs to keep ego in check.
4. Needs to have attention to detail.
5. Must not get trapped into making the same point over and over.
6. Must excercise extreme patience – the other side does not have quick reflexes.
7. Needs to work with the client’s wife.
8. Needs to be careful not to leak confidential without prejudice letters.
9. Must have humility – needs to understand that you can always learn from others.
10. Must be persistent and dynamic – able to change the strategy at any time.
11. Realise the motivation for the action.
12. Will be paid well – there is an opportunity to earn royalties.
13. Must understand immigration law.
14. Must keep up to date with immigration law.

The defendant:

1. Will pretend to not understand  past, present and future tense.
2. Uses rudimentary technology.
3. Cannot navigate Google maps.
4. Will argue themselves out of an alibi.
5. Will use techniques to try to drive up legal costs.
6. Will point out errors and feign ignorance.
7. Will use confusion as a distraction technique.
   
8. Does not respond to compliments – you will not be able to build rapport or trust.
   
9. Are cunning but not very smart.
10. Has difficulty counting – will refer to 2 and 3 solutions interchangeably.
11. Genuinely believes that time does not matter.
12. Will not quote information in whole or in context.
13. Will use every word you say against you.
14. Does not have a good command of English. Words such as how and live need to be explained fully.
15. Only understand concise and simple language – they often misinterpret what they are told. They do not understand familial relationships such as daughter.
16. Will ask for evidence and then critique the evidence when it is given to them. It is difficult to keep them happy.
17. Will try to introduce inadmissible evidence such as attendance notes.
18. Will try to confuse leave to enter, leave to remain, 5-year route and 10-year route.
19. Has a hard time discerning the difference between guidance for Home Office staff and the law.
20. Does not always think logically or in sequence.
21. Will try to attack client’s wife not realising she is undeterred and does not care.
22. Does not understand that threats of defamation are not taken seriously.
23. Will only admit to the clients name in their defense. Everything else is denied.
24. Does not seem to feel shame – elements of sociopathic behaviour.